It’s one thing to be in a relationship. It’s another thing to be in the kind that you deserve. Yet unfortunately, there are a lot of women who want to be with someone, so badly, that they don’t make their needs a top priority. And when that’s the case, the words of a writer by the name of Maureen Dowd ring true: “When you settle for less than you deserve, you end up getting less than what you settled for.”
That’s why we wanted to do our part to help each of you either get to the kind of relationship that you’re deserving of and/or to recognize if you’re in a healthy or unhealthy relationship. As you go down all of the things on this list, please believe that you’re worthy of receiving each and every one. No doubt about it.
1. Love
Here’s the thing to remember about love. It’s not simply something that the person you’re with should say (once they’re ready). Their actions should also reflect that you are someone who is very important to them. And this shouldn’t happen every once in a while either. You deserve to feel loved…each and every day.
2. Respect
Respect. It basically means to be esteemed. And here’s the thing about respect: Your body should be respected. Your feelings should be respected. Your wants and needs should be respected. When it comes to a relationship, one of the best things about respect is that it’s not hard to detect. Either he’s respecting you or he’s not. If you don’t feel respected…you’re not respected. Guaranteed.
3. Loyalty
If you and yours have come to the conclusion that your relationship is exclusive, then that means that neither of you should be seeing anyone else. You deserve someone who is going to say what they mean and mean what they say. A man who tells you that you’re the only one and means it? That’s loyalty.
4. Honesty
A lot of people believe that honesty is simply about telling the truth. While that is one definition of the word, other’s including being honorable, being sincere and being fair. And yes, when you’re in a relationship with someone, you deserve to have them be all of these words towards you.
5. Patience
Patience isn’t about merely being willing to wait. An individual who is patient is going to deal with challenges in a calm manner. This means that they won’t fly off of the handle. They also won’t become frustrated when you make a mistake. Love is patient. Is he patient with you?
6. Affection
Sex and affection are not synonymous. When someone is affectionate, they can hug you or hold your hand or even kiss you without expecting your clothes to come off. Every woman deserves to be with the kind of man who knows that intimacy is not always sexual.
7. Friendship
A friend is someone you can share all of who you are with and not worry about being judged or rejected. A friend has your back no matter what. A friend is always looking out for your best interest. That’s why the best relationships grow from friendships.
8. Consistency
This is something that everyone deserves but, unfortunately, far too many people overlook. Listen, it doesn’t really matter if you’re getting everything on this list if it’s not happening on a consistent basis. You shouldn’t have to wonder from day to day what version of the person you’re seeing, you’re actually getting. If that’s that’s currently happening to do, yeah…you deserve so much more. And better.
9. Acceptance
This one is pretty simple. Someone who truly cares about you is going to accept you. As is. Not only that but they are going to find the “as is” version of you pretty darn amazing. Remember that.
10. Chivalry
Men who open doors and pull out seats still exist. It’s just that a lot of women don’t require this behavior. If you want a chivalrous man, don’t settle. You deserve it.
11. Kindness
What does it mean when someone is kind? Basically it means that they are tender, helpful and considerate. Is your man all of these things towards you?
12. Having your needs met
There’s really no point in being in a relationship if you are meeting his needs but he is not meeting yours. A relationship should consist of someone you can rely on. If there’s no one else on the entire planet who you can call, he should be the exception.
13. A sense of humor
Relationships can be trying at times. The thing that can get you through them is a sense of humor.
14. Support
There’s a pretty good chance that you’re going to go through a serious challenge or receive some really bad news if you’re in your relationship long enough. You’re going to need his support. Do you feel like you already have it?
15. Encouragement
There are also going to be exams, interviews and goals that you’ll want to reach. He should also be the kind of individual who is willing to encourage you. He should be the very best kind of cheerleader!
16. An ear to listen
A lot of relationships fail because of a lack of communication. And that tends to happen when both people fail to really listen to one another. If he talks over you, if he cuts you off, if he belittles your feelings, he’s a horrible listener. Just or the record.
17. A shoulder to cry on
If you’re having a bad day, you’re going to need someone who has a shoulder to cry on. Hopefully your guy is that kind of man. You deserve it.
